Why would I want to?
Okay so when I first started reading the cards at 16 I only cared about one thing, finding my Soulmate of course! As the years went by I realized I was not alone in that. So many women would come to me for readings on when they would find love or for better understanding of what was taking place in their relationships, that it became my specialty. I was the psychic love therapist, and I really enjoyed it!
I had absolutely no interest at all whatsoever in becoming a psychic medium. I had a certain amount of respect and reverence for it, but no desire to do it. It was sooo not my thing!
How it all began...
Well, it's common for many intuitive readers as they develop themselves psychically to begin to pick up on those from the other side. I was in my 20's at the time and had been giving psychic readings for about 10 years so I guess it was bound to happen.
Oddly, when it happened to me, I was (I can't believe I'm admitting this) drunk at a New Years Eve party. Yep. We were playing poker and I was going on about how the playing cards are derived from the Tarot and offered to give the host of the party a reading with them. I have no idea why my dumb drunk self did that because I had never given a reading with a regular deck of playing cards before. Come to think of it... I haven't since.
So there I was trying to glean info from the cards for the guy I was reading for and suddenly there's a spirit standing to my side. He was our age, cool, and kinda felt like one of us at the party. I liked him. But still ignored him.
When these types of experiences happen of course the mind resists it and says 'it's your imagination' or 'you've had way too much to drink' or 'this can't be happening, there is no way this is seriously happening'. And while I was extremely open minded and absolutely a believer in life after death, it's something else entirely to discover it standing beside you at a New Years Eve party.
Needless to say, he was extremely distracting. My awareness of the presence of this spirit was interfering with my ability to give this guy a reading. Not wanting to be the psychic let down, I finally surrendered and announced my dilemma to him and the onlookers.
I'm not sure if they were too drunk to care, or not taking me seriously, but they were surprisingly supportive and accepting of it so I commenced.
Maybe it was a good thing that I was drunk at the time since I would never have had the courage to do that under any other circumstance.
He communicated clearly, I was able to hear him and see glimpses of images that he showed me. It turned out that the spirit who was there was the brother of the man I was giving the reading to. They had lived in that very house together with a roommate and he had died exactly a year ago, to the day. Wow.
The strange thing about it was that I didn't experience a sense of astonishment from the experience. It was so natural, like chatting with someone at the party. Only the conversation was a psychic conversation (as it is with every spirit that I 'talk' to). He was, after all, still a personality. Of course it did get heavy and emotional, but the feeling of resolution and healing that resulted brought me to realize that my psychic readings could offer much more help to people than psychic investigation into their love lives.
What came next?
I don't know if that opened a flood gate or what because after that I was noticing and hearing spirits everywhere. My grandmother came around to visit. Spirits pestered me to give messages to their loved ones who I would come across in daily life. There was one that pushed me to give a message to a lady at the daycare I took my kids to. That didn't go well for me by the way, I ended up in an extremely awkward situation. People aren't always receptive to these types of things. Sometimes they were though. When I was a bartender I had a regular whose mother had passed and she came through clearly for her with a message of love and consolation.
After that it became fairly common for them to just 'show up' during a reading. It wasn't every reading that I gave but fairly often.
When I received my training as a Reiki Master I began to notice that they would arrive during the healing sessions that I was giving. Usually with a quick message and to offer some love then they would step aside while their Angels and Guides would administer the healing.
Knowing that I do have the ability to receive messages from loved ones on the other side, I went ahead and boldly decided to offer 'medium' readings as one of the services that I provide. That was kind of a risk for me. See, up to that point the spirits who wanted to contact their loved ones would come to me. Not the other way around. Suddenly I was faced with the challenge of figuring out how I would reach out to a loved one on the other side on behalf of my client.
Developing the Skill
After doing some research and meditating on it, I realized that if the person comes to me to connect to a loved one on the other side... The spirit usually knows they are coming. Or they were prompting them to go in the first place. I've also discovered that if the invitation is sent out, they hear it and respond. Much like placing a call on the phone.
When I set up my energy space for providing readings I set the intention that the room is a space between worlds where spirits of loved ones are welcome to come but must be accompanied by my Guides and announce themselves by name or description.
Usually when they arrive I can 'feel' them more then I can 'see' them. It's just a change in the energy of the space. I've always been able to feel a person's energy, so I can do the same with a spirit. And when I 'hear' them, it's mostly from my left side.
Some are easier to feel and hear than others. Almost as if they vary in strength to put out the energy needed to communicate their messages. It seems to me that they have to reach a bit too sometimes.
There's usually a 'tuning in' period as well. Almost like trying to get a radio station to come in clearly. Starting off a bit distant and unclear and gradually increasing in strength. I guess I'm still learning how to immediately zoom in on the various unique frequencies that they have. It does still take me a few minutes to get a strong hold on them. And to be honest, I don't always get a consistently strong hold. Sometimes it fades in and out throughout the entire reading. All I can do is verbalize to the client every impression I am receiving through the process.
Sometimes they have silly requests. For example, the spirit of this woman's brother wanted for me to pull up a chair for him to sit on. I granted his request and he was pleased.
I've also set up a way of communicating that helps me. Almost like little code rules. They give me messages that are easy to understand or relate to. For example, they offer me a very definite 'yes' feeling and a very definite 'no' feeling. This is handy. And the spirits seem to use it just as frequently with me as the guides do. If they are referencing another person they have ways of showing me if the person is family or a friend, young or old, male or female. This assists me in narrowing down who it is that they are discussing. When it comes to a time line they can show me a short or longer space in time going into the past or the future. Often they will offer the name of a month if the event that is being referenced is of significance.
Do I enjoy giving Medium Readings?
I don't mind talking to the spirits of the deceased. In fact, they are pretty cool. It's just like talking to living people only they often have a bit of a broader view on things. And I learn a lot from them and from every reading I give.
This one really neat lady who was the deceased grandmother of one of my clients was telling me that as spirits they can only put through one energy message at a time to communicate. So she can either give me an audio message, a visual, or a feeling. But if they are putting energy into communicating with one, it takes away the ability to do another (which makes perfect sense because that is how I will receive it, they do not come in bundled together it will be a various order of a feeling, an image, or some conversation). When I told my client that her grandmother was giving me tips on communicating with spirit she told me that her grandmother was very much into psychics and the metaphysical while she was alive, so it didn't surprise her at all that she was offering insight for me. It was really cool!
I've also learned that they tend to have attachments to objects that they maintain even after death. It's a topic that comes up often during a spirit reading. This one client came in to see me to contact her brother who had passed on and when he came through he was a bit annoyed at how she had sold all of his belongings along with his house. Apparently he had an extremely valuable baseball card collection that he had been working on his entire life, and it was sold along with all the items in his house. This upset him. When I told her so, she started bickering with him. Apparently she knew about his card collection and she was saying she didn't know it was in the house. And he was like "where else would it be!" All of this going on and I'm just thinking to myself "great... drama from beyond the grave and I'm stuck in the middle" hahaha!
It was fine though, in fact as the reading progressed his anger subsided and was gradually replaced with love and good feelings. The fact that I am a Reiki Master and can channel high vibrational love energy into these situations helps to elevate and heal them. I am thankful to have my Reiki training as an augmentation to the readings that I provide for people. It's not just about connecting them to their loved ones, it often becomes a healing experience not just for the person receiving the reading but for the spirit as well.
Something else that I find extremely interesting is that not only do they maintain their personalities but also their belief systems. I've had a few instances where the spirit didn't believe in ME! In life, they considered psychics and mediums to be fakes so they carry that same belief with them. It's so ironic! I had a father one time who was a really grumpy old guy coming through for his daughter. He was telling me "your just a fake" then insulted me in Spanish (they were hispanic). But then he would go on to say "Now tell my daughter this....." I wasn't offended at all, in fact I was more intrigued and amused at the situation. The daughter confirmed that he did not believe in this stuff in his life and that was very much his personality.
Probably the most existentially powerful reading I've given thus far was of a Mormon man who had passed on and his wife came in to contact him. When he first came through he was confused and extremely distrustful of me. He was reluctant to believe that his wife and daughter were really there... such was his own personal belief that he would never see them again after he passed. I got the feeling from him that he was very religious and when I asked his wife she confirmed that he was indeed and that was when I learned that he was a Mormon.
Now, I did not feel that he went to a 'bad' place when he passed. But it did feel very separate and possessive maybe? For lack of a better term? Almost as if his spirit went where it had agreed to go, to do what was expected and there was no allowing for his involvement with his family in this world after the fact.
It was so unusual for me. It did not follow the familiar pattern at all. So often the spirits know everything about what's going on in their loved ones life here. Sometimes taking credit for things that they have done to help them out, or sharing happiness and excitement over events that have taken place since their passing. The spirits will often confirm belongings the person has of theirs as well as let them know that those times when the person was reaching out to them that they did hear them.
But in the instance with this woman, her question to her deceased husband was "does he hear me, I talk to him - does he hear me?" And in this case I had to uncomfortably tell her that he in fact did not. He didn't even know that he could.
Observing the energy shift that took place as the realization dawned on him that he could go visit his home and family even though he was in spirit, was truly touching for me. I attempted to try to explain to him how he could do it but he stopped me and said "he would figure it out". There was a feeling of happiness in him that made my work worth doing for me. As for his wife, I assured her that he would now be around.
After the reading I really had to take a moment to explore the possibility of what life after death is really like. And the implications our personal belief systems could have on it. This man truly believed that he would never see his family again after he passed and had in a sense, created that for himself. When it came up, and there I was with his wife and daughter... He could hardly believe it. It had a feeling of if I were to walk up to a non-believer in the grocery store and say 'hey your deceased husband is here with me and wants to say hello'. Imagine!
Can it be dangerous to talk to Spirits?
I just don't understand why people are so afraid of spirits. I think we have the media to thank for that. I mean, I can't even find some decent pictures to purchase for this blog. When I go to my photo site the search for spirits or ghosts yields a bunch of nonsense zombie type stuff. If it's not that, it's Halloween kids covered in a sheet. Seriously?
On behalf of all the nice and pretty spirits out there, I am offended.
Based on my personal observations and experience, I do not consider talking to spirits necessarily dangerous. Then again, you gotta be smart about it. If you remember that spirits were people once too, the answer is the same if you asked if it could be dangerous talking to people.
Sure it can, but would you really walk up to a violent criminal and be like "yo what's up!" You wouldn't.
And I dunno, maybe if you did and you were nice he might just be like "yo what's up" back and then go on his violent criminal way.
Or if you do happen to accidentally cross paths with one and you felt unsafe, you could always call the police or get your gun out for protection. Same is true for the spirit world. There are of course different forms of 'police' and 'guns' in the spirit world but they exist and can offer a very legitimate form of protection from entities that seek to cause harm.
I love working with Archangel Michael, there is no doubt that he IS the Bouncer of the Spirit World. All you have to do is ask him for help and then give thanks after. I've never seen an energy or entity that he couldn't handle swiftly and efficiently. He just shows up and instantaneously removes them. Go Archangel Michael! I love him.
There is however, energies that we call 'attachments' and they can be extremely problematic. They aren't always spirits of the deceased but sometimes they are. And they do run rampant. Almost half of the clients I see have some form of attachment in their energy field. This is a subject that is too broad to discuss here, so if you are interested read my blog on attachments. They are surprisingly easy to remove but can cause big time trouble for you if you pick one up. I call them the 'flu bugs' of the spirit world because they are viral in nature and can be contagious. We are also highly susceptible to them when our energy field is weakened much like we are susceptible to picking up a flu bug when our immune system is low.
Advice for those who want to talk to Spirits
First of all, understand that the energy world is structured differently then the physical world that we are familiar with. The best way I can describe it is that it consists of layers. Certain vibrations exist in certain layers.
A lower vibrational entity will exist with the rest of the lower vibrational entities in the low vibration layer. Get it? When I say low vibration I am referring to an energy that is low. It's the unhappy stuff where fear, anger, pain, and anxiety exist. And guess what? Lower vibrational entities exist to soak up all those lower vibrational emotions. Let it be a lesson for us. When we are experiencing those feelings on a regular basis it can easily attract those low vibrational entities. Sometimes when they attach they can instigate those feelings in you so that they can feed on that low energy. Yucky.
But don't beat yourself up over it... We all experience it. We travel among these layers in day to day life. When we are depressed, we are in a lower level vibration, and when we are feeling gratitude and universal love we are in a higher vibration.
As for the higher vibrations, those of love, joy, gratitude, and celebration, well the higher vibrational entities exist together in those higher layers. Angels and Guides are at the highest frequencies. And those entities with love are on a layer a little under them... see how there is a range of vibrations and layers? There is a massive range of layers between the high and the low.
When it comes to reaching out to talk to spirits your most likely going to find your dead grandma who loves you in the higher vibrations. If she hated you... well, I dunno. My point here is that as long as you are mindful of how it works, it's really easy and safe to talk to spirits.
I always use things which will raise the energy of the environment. Certain sounds and scents will raise the energy vibration. So, if you use an incense like Sage or Nag Champa (you want it to be a natural based incense) then ring a little bell... Your going to raise the energy of the environment to a level where lower level energies cannot be present. It's also extremely important to approach it from a place of love and trust. Fear is a low level energy and so you do not want it in you when you are working with spirit.
There it is! I have so much more to share about connecting to the spirits of loved ones but I must save it for another time.